


Ghouls, Monsters, and Freaks

by QueenoftheDamned65



Category: South Park
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Dark Comedy, Everyone Is Gay, F/F, Haunted Houses, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Paranormal Investigators
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-12
Updated: 2020-10-15
Packaged: 2021-03-08 04:21:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,602
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26979496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenoftheDamned65/pseuds/QueenoftheDamned65
Summary: The five of them were no stranger to the supernatural. Living in a magnet for the bizarre such as South Park ensured that they would experience various horrors and monstrosities not meant for human eyes by the age of twelve. Of course, that doesn't stop them from running headfirst into all kinds of weird and dangerous shit. From haunted houses to the local vampires, this is not going to be a pleasant school year.
Relationships: Christophe "The Mole"/Gregory of Yardale, Christophe "The Mole"/Kenny McCormick, Craig Tucker/Tweek Tweak, Kyle Broflovski/Christophe "The Mole", Philip "Pip" Pirrip/Damien Thorn, Rebecca Cotswolds/Estella Havisham
Comments: 3
Kudos: 11





	1. Prologue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is only the prologue, so it will be a lot shorter than some of the other chapters. Sorry!

The five of them were no stranger to the supernatural. Living in a magnet for the bizarre such as South Park ensured that they would experience various horrors and monstrosities not meant for human eyes by the age of twelve.  
Despite not living there even half as long as his peers, Damien was indifferent to the paranormal happenings which haunted the town. He treated them as normal even when he first arrived in town at the age of eight. Soon, a majority of children avoided Damien, likely due to his fiery temperament. The only person he seemed to be close to was a child named Philip, who treated him like an old friend within seconds of meeting him.  
Philip also appeared to have a familiarity with the stranger aspects of the town but treated them with far more kindness than Damien ever would have. His knowledge regarding the town seemed limitless, as though he had seen anything and everything to ever occur there. The town’s children also stayed away from him. They couldn’t help but get the feeling that he had something to hide. This was along with the fact that he seemed to know all of their secrets, despite the fact that none of them had ever even spoken to him.  
After transferring to South Park, Christophe quickly became known as the Mole by his peers. It’s unclear whether this nickname originated from his tendency to carry around a shovel, or his dear friend Gregory using him to spy on their peers. Either way, he was well known as someone to be wary of. While a bit creeped out by the horrors of the town, he was still rather fascinated by them. He mostly hung around the other exchange students, usually Gregory or Philip, and remained relatively quiet. The two of them appeared to be the only reason he would stay.  
Estella was angry. She hated the town, she hated her brother, and she hated every horrible thing she had to deal with on a daily basis. She couldn’t help but find herself infuriated by everything about the town; from it’s unnatural abominations, to the population of complete and total idiots residing there. She transferred to the town with her brother Gregory and quickly became known as someone both useful and terrifying. She seemed to know what was gonna happen, to the very last detail, days, or even weeks in advance.  
In contrast to the other exchange students, Gregory wanted to understand the supernatural aspects of the town beyond just the small interactions he had with them. He wished to know why he heard people clawing at his window, begging for him to save them, only for there to be nothing there. It horrified him, and never ceased to haunt his thoughts. These tales quickly isolated him from his peers, until only the other transfers would listen to a word he said.  
At that point, they really had no choice but to group up together. They were already ostracised and ridiculed for the entirety of their time in this shitty town anyway, might as well have a few friends to make the day bearable.


	2. The Haunting of Some Old House

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dumbass kids investigate a haunted house. It goes slightly worse than expected.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my first fic for this fandom so there might be some ooc. I'm going to work on it. Sorry!

The old van skidded to a stop in front of the rotting old mansion. It had clearly been abandoned for a century at the very least, and it was overtaken by the wilderness surrounding it. Dandelion seeds were scattered in the air, along with the faint scent of almonds.  
As the doors to the van opened, Christophe let out a sigh. Being the only one in the group with a functioning vehicle forced him into the role of getaway driver for when his friends got too deep into whatever weird shit Gregory liked to get them involved with. Not that he really minded. He would’ve taken any excuse to get out of the house at that point, even if it was to investigate some creepy old house.  
What he did mind however was the goddamn screaming match going on in the back seat.  
“Oh, so it’s MY fault you forgot the bloody camera?!” Estella looked like she was on the verge of suffocating Damien with his own turtleneck sweater.  
“You could have EASILY predicted that I would forget the shitty camera! I bet you did and you just want to have a REASON to get angry at me FOR ONCE!” Damien was most definitely going to come home in multiple pieces now.  
“Now let’s just calm down and-” Philip was quickly interrupted by further arguing and Gregory announcing their arrival.  
“We’re finally here everyone!” This was not a long drive at all, in fact, it was only ten minutes long with no traffic. Still, Gregory always had a flair for the dramatic, “Calm down my friends, FOR I brought a camera! Mole told me you forgot, so we don’t have to keep arguing!”  
Philip looked relieved, which was understandable considering he was between Estella and Damien for the entirety of the ten minute car ride desperately trying to keep both parties calm. Christophe gave him a look of sympathy before hopping out of the car. Philip, however, continued to fidget with his gloves awkwardly. A look of dread crept across his face as he looked at the decrepit building. He especially hated the prospect of touching anything in the house, for fear of the house’s history.  
Damien, on the other hand, had an uncharacteristically wide smile on his face, like a child at a candy store. Gregory must have gotten to him with talk of the glory and adoration they would receive for the evidence of a real haunting. He wasn’t normally one to get swept up in Gregory’s speeches, after all Chris filled that role rather nicely, but for some reason, this house sparked something in him. A fire lit in the brush at his excitement.  
“I- DEAR GOD! DAMIEN!” Gregory shrieked at the fire which had just barely avoided setting the entire forest surrounding them ablaze. Christophe instinctively shielded Gregory with his body as Gregory clung to him in turn. Damien’s face grew red as Christophe put the fire out with his shovel. Philip patted his shoulders sympathetically with his gloved hands.  
“BAISE MEC!” Christophe snapped, still shaking from the sudden shock. Gregory immediately let go of him and grabbed his camera out of the car.  
“ANYWAY-” Gregory interjected a string of French curses, “Let’s just.. Go inside.” Estella groaned and nodded her head while Damien looked at Philip, who looked at the rotting building with apprehension.  
Gregory, as usual, led the charge inside. He grinned from ear to ear at the prospect of finally getting his peers to believe him when-  
Something was wrong, his body wouldn’t move and he could barely breathe. Suddenly the air around him was as cold as death and the air reeked of rotting flesh. His vision was blurring and he could vaguely hear someone shout his name before everything went dark.  
Everyone stared at Gregory, shocked at his crumpled form on the ground. Estella quickly ran over to check on him, but just before she could reach him he rose into the air and spoke with a voice that was not his own. His camera shattered on the ground.  
“where. is. my. son.” The voice boomed throughout the building with a subtle rage that sounded as though it had been hidden for an eternity, which could easily have been the case, “I SAID. WHERE IS MY SON?!”   
Philip’s eyes darted around the room, desperately searching for an advantage over whoever, or whatever had forced its way into Gregory’s body. Seeing an opening, he grabbed Damien and dragged him deeper into the house.  
Damien was just about to ask Philip why the hell he just did that, when Philip ripped his gloves off and gestured for Damien to make some light. Realizing Philip’s plan, he ignited a small fire at his fingertips.  
Philip quickly began to scour for anything that could reveal the history behind the house when he found it. Shards of a porcelain teacup laid out on the floor gathering dust and cobwebs. Philip quickly picked up one of the shattered pieces with his ungloved hand and let the past overtake him. Damien held Philip up to avoid alerting anyone of their location in what he realized was most likely the bedroom of whatever was possessing their friend.  
Philip looked around and found himself in a much nicer version of the room he was previously in. A woman held what Philip assumed was her infant son, as a man came in with a pot of tea. The room suddenly began to fill with the scent of almonds as the women gazed adoringly at her husband. A glint of malice flashed in his eye as he offered her a cup of tea. Of course, she accepted, just as Philip began to put together what happened.  
He looked on in horror as the woman put her baby down so that she could drink it, completely oblivious to her fate. She took a sip and almost immediately dropped the cup to the floor and collapsed onto her hands and knees. Her husband walked away, a smirk evident on his face, as she reached for her wailing son.  
Meanwhile…  
Estella and Christophe dodged an assortment of objects thrown at them by the thing in Gregory’s skin. It kept screaming at them about something, they didn’t know what. They were too busy dodging the specter’s attacks to really pay attention. Estella was trying to distract it so that Christophe could get an opportunity to see what the hell Philip and Damien were doing. So far the only opening she could predict was from behind.  
She tackled Gregory’s body to the ground in one swift motion. His eyes flickered with a spark of recognition before he began to spasm.  
Simultaneously, Christophe closed his eyes and found himself in the bedroom with Damien and Philip. Philip was ungloved, clinging to a shard of porcelain. His eyes were clouded over, and he appeared to be mouthing something.   
Christophe’s eyes burst open to see Gregory spasming on the floor, screams pouring out of his mouth. It sounded like two people were screaming at once, and Gregory’s eyes alternated between a sinister, icy blue, and a light shade of hazel. Tears streamed down his cheeks like a river.  
“LOOK OUT!” The poltergeist broke out of Estella’s grasp and lunged at Christophe. Christophe braced for an impact, but it never came. He opened his eyes to see a wall of flames surrounding his attacker.  
“Y’know, we really suck at this,” Damien smirked at his remark and reached out his hand to Christophe. Mole snickered at his friend's comment before grabbing on.  
“So..” Christophe looked around, “The hell happened to Philip?”  
“ELIZABETH ABIGAIL BANFIELD!” Gregory’s body twisted around at the sound of Philip’s voice, “Sorry, I had to get your attention somehow and- OH GOODNESS!”   
Elizabeth left Gregory’s body at the mention of her name, leaving him to fall from his place midair. She teleported to Philip and grabbed him by the neck. Christophe caught Gregory just before he hit the floor.  
She was as pale as death and her sunken eyes glowed an unnatural blue. Her hair was the only thing about her that even looked half alive, it seemed to remain the same reddish-brown she had while alive. Blue ooze, which Gregory would have pointed out to be ectoplasm if he were conscious, poured out her mouth and eyes. It burned through the rotting ashwood floor she held Philip above.  
“Your… your son,” Her icy grip around his neck tightened and years upon years of memories flowed through his brain, “alive..” She instantly dropped him to the floor.  
“WHERE!?” Banfield shrieked at Philip, who was on the verge of unconsciousness. Damien sprinted over and placed himself between them.  
“Cillian is one of the geezers in the old folks home on the other side of town.” Sparks and ashes flew at his feet as he barely controlled his rage, “Now if you wouldn’t mind, I would GREATLY prefer if you did not attempt to murder my friends.” If it weren’t for the situation, Estella would have laughed at how similar he sounded to Philip.  
“Oh..” She rasped, “Well.. umm... Thank you!” She vanished in an instant, leaving everyone to wonder what the hell just happened.  
Gregory’s eyes opened to find himself between Philip and Estella in Christophe’s crappy old van. Philip gazed out the window, his eyes looking at nothing in particular. Estella had her nose buried in a book on the occult which she had most likely borrowed from the goths. They seemed surprisingly okay with her, all things considered. Christophe and Damien appeared to be having an intense discussion about horror movies from the 1960s.  
“So did we get any footage?” Gregory knew they didn’t, it was painfully obvious from the atmosphere inside the vehicle.  
“No ya bloody idiot!” Estella was the only one who really felt the need to answer, “Now do you want food from the shitty Chinese place or the shitty American place?”  
“Chinese, I guess but-”  
“Yay,” Philip brought his fist up in a sign of victory and bumped it with Christophe’s.  
“So no evidence whatsoever?” Gregory sighed, too tired to make a speech about how they “Would rise from the ashes of their defeat like a phoenix” or some other melodramatic crap. Damien nodded with one of those awkward smiles which solely exists for self-preservation.  
“Ah well,” Everyone looked at him with shock at his defeated demeanor, “There’s no shortage of horror in this town! We shall RISE from the ashes of this defeat like a PHOENIX!” Everyone calmed down as Gregory returned to his normal, theater kid self.  
They proceeded to drive for five more minutes, far more lively now that Gregory was awake.  
“I’m telling ya, you’ll love it!” Damien was fangirling over some obscure grindhouse flick from the seventies to Christophe in between shoving spring rolls down his throat, “You liked all those French extremity films I showed you! Just trust me here!”  
“Alright, alright!” Christophe pushed Damien away so he could eat his wonton in peace. Philip let out a chuckle at their antics as he nibbled on a piece of chicken, while Estella rolled her eyes. Gregory was still at the counter paying the poor cashier and trying to apologize for Damien, who had gotten into a screaming rant about the SFX required to convincingly kill someone in a movie. Philip smiled at Damien’s enthusiasm, in contrast to everyone else, who were mortified.  
On the ride home, Philip called shotgun immediately. Gregory grumbled a bit as he sat in the back with Damien and Estella, who were bickering over Damien getting them kicked out and banned from one of the only restaurants in town that wasn’t absurdly expensive or a strip club.  
Christophe dropped Damien and Philip off first since Damien was staying at Philip’s for the night in order to maintain his alibi. Next was Estella and Gregory, who were both incredibly tired from the day that they just had.  
Finally, Christophe went to his house, avoiding his mother’s room wherein he heard some televangelist or something talking on the tv about how the devil had snaked his way into the youth. He imagined what Damien would say to that. He’d probably start a fire and announce it was too late to save them. Which was absolutely true, but that’s not the point.  
As he went to bed at the perfectly healthy time of three a.m he realized something horrible. He had school tomorrow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter's gonna focus on Estella a lot more. Rebecca's showing up too bc I'm shipping trash. And Kenny's the cashier.


End file.
